Roller Coaster Ride

That is how the past two weeks have been. We have just been so busy. Becca has been home this week. Boy, did the boys miss her. I missed her too. It is so great to have her home. Britt will be home tomorrow. Whew. It has been a long three weeks. I haven't heard her voice for over two weeks. I have talked to her via email twice and a text. I don't know what I will do when she moves out or goes into the service?!
Not much else other than my brother's ex wife shit but, that's not my problem and not really wanting to get into other than wacked out.

I miss her

Because, I miss her sweet smile, giggle, and her glem in her eyes when she tells me something she enjoys.

I got a phone call late Sunday night/Monday morning at 1:00 am. "My atm card won't work! I can't get any money out" I had this panic go through my body what's wrong when the phone rang. The last thing I was worried about was Britt. My step dad is out of the country also. My brother just went thru a nasty marriage. My mother in law has cancer. Britt was the last thing on my mind. I thought we had everything covered when she left. We did everything they told us.
I camly told her it would have to wait until Monday morning. But it is Monday morning and I have no money. I can't do anything until the bank opens in 9 hours. Oh yah, I could see her smile. The glem in her eyes.
I went to the bank. They forgot to send the email to the card office. I left 45 minutes later, why so long. I wanted to make sure, it was taken care of. I was not leaving until I knew my daughter had money. Got home and sent her an email. Looks like it's ago. I was wrong so wrong. Bank calls yesterday. She keeps on trying to access checking, well they don't give you a choice. And to top it off you can NOT access saving accounts. Why didn't the bank know this? Hello! I am hoping the problem is solved. I opened a checking account and attached her bank card to it. So, it looks like it is ago for her to have money. Hopefully, tonight or tomorrow morning. Otherwise, I can try and Western Union her some money. Hello..........she is basically backpacking thru Europe.
I hope to know that she has gotten money soon. Time to go check the bank and find out. Then, I will know she is smiling.

Phone Call

I got a 3 minute phone call from Britt. We had a bad signal on my cell phone going thru the mountains on our we to the beach.
She is having a blast and misses everyone. She said Italy was dirty and stinky. (I guess, they are on a garbage strike.) She is sick of pasta and bread. Oh my, favorite. She is now in France. They went to the beach yesterday. Tomorrow, she will be staying with a family. I hope I will have another phone call.
I will update more about our weekend later.

Sucks!!!!!!!!!

Today has been such a trying day. First, Becca is home sick in Seattle with my step sister and her family. What am I to do. She is not eating and crying. I told her I would come and get her but she wants to stick it out. If she is not happy...................I hate it when my kids hurt.
The boys have been hell on wheels today. Why? I guess, maybe because ford and I had a fight last night. We don't agree on how certain things should be handled. I don't believe in spanking with a belt. He does. With out going into a of detail but my dad raised us with a firm hand. I don't want my kids raised that way. When ford get really tired, he has no patience with the kids. It has gotten worse over the past 6 months. Mainly, when his mom found out she had cancer. Sometimes, he just leaves my heart aching. I am not sure if his love is healthly for us. If that makes any sense? I don't want to live the rest of my life walking on egg shells. Hell, life is too short. Trust me.
I know I could raise the kids on my own. I don't want to. I want us to be a family and that is slipping away so fast. The girls are older and doing their own thing.
I just feel he sometimes takes everything and turns it around. Which, then makes me the bad guy. What the hell! I am the one that holds this family together. He is the one that comes home...............works on truck, eats, and goes to bed. Maybe, he's not happy. I just wish he would tell so I would know.

Email

I got an email from Britt. She is alive and well. She is having a hard time with the phones. She is having a blast and she did repell down the castle wall. Brave for her. I am so happy for her. My mood today has been on cloud nine. I think I smiled all day today. What a relief. More to come later.

Breath Deeply

Still no word! It is after midnight in Assisi Italy. Day 4 without hearing from her. I am sure it is because, phones and time are hard to find. I know they changed hotels. I was hoping for some sort of word from her today.
I hope she is having a blast. I wish I could so be there. Maybe, Ford and I can take a vacation there some day. I would have to lose weight first. I should make that a goal.
I know on Tuesday, they stay with a host family. Hopefully, I will get a call then. I am praying for a call then. I should have gotten the international cell phone rental. Oh well. I just need to breath deeply.

The Waiting Game

I have yet to hear from Britt. They are 9 hours ahead of us. I was hoping to hear from her today. I know some of the hotels don't have phones in the rooms and she is very busy. I did get a call from the phone tree and I know she landed safely and off they went.
I wish I would have done things differently. Such as a international cell phone, which I could have rented but didn't. I got her a international calling card to call from a pay phone.
Today they were going to the Vatican. I hope she is taking lots of pictures. They leave Rome tomorrow morning and head to Assisi Italy.
I will just wait and see if she calls. The waiting game is on.

Offical

Britt is off on an airplane across the ocean. We left the house this morning at 3 am to get to the airport. They started checking in the group at 4:15 got her checked in, something to eat, group photo and off thru securtiy. We said our good byes with tears, hugs, I love yous, and the I love you sign. I watched her walk thru security and to the other side. I am so scared and sad. She does not have her cell phone. I just hopes she knows how much I love her and how proud I am of her.
They left Portland landed in New York. Had a 4 hour lay over. I just checked on their flight to Italy and it will be 2 hours late. What the hell happened? I have know way of knowing. I can track her flight on-line. She has 4 hours of flight over the big wide sea. I know I will not be sleeping tonight and waiting for my phone tree call in the morning. I can get up at 3 and check to see if she landed. Italy is 9 hours ahead of us. I am hoping she is sleeping on the plane. I am sure she will be ok.
Britt I am very proud of you and glad you are my daughter. I am hoping for you to have a safe, wonderfull trip of a life time. I will be glad to see your smile in 20 days and counting. Love Mom

speachless

Happy 4th of July. We had a softball tournament all day. We lost all three of our games but Red played awsome. She had her game face on. I am very proud of her. There is a very stuck up group of moms that do not sit with any of the other parents or cheer on anyone elses kids. I was reminded today not to let it get to me. "They put their clothes on just like we do and their shit smells just like ours" I just get so angry. But, that in itself is a whole other post for another time.
We are able to watch the fireworks from our driveway and enjoy them. I didn't watch but the kids did. I let Brit go off to a party. Big mistake. Her best friend, brought her home and she was so drunk. I am at a loss of words at this point. She leaves for Europe next Sunday. It is one thing that is not acceptable in our house. I don't even know where to begin or what kind of punishment I need to do. I would love to know what she was thinking. At this point, I put a sleeping bag in the backyard and drug her ass out there. I guess, we will deal with it in the morning. Oh yah, she works tomorrow (today) from 11-9. We will see what happens. Some more fireworks;)

Yard work

My poor backyard looks like shit. I have these ideas but never seem to follow thru all the way. I want an island get away back there. I want to be able to sit out there and enjoy it. But it never happens that way. Another, summer is here and still so much work to do. I just need to spend the money and get it done right. It doesn't help that we are so busy with sports and racing that it doesn't happen. I broke the lawn mower last week and had to borrow my dad's. When, will it ever end?

Sleep?

Sleep, what's that? Parker has been having problems with his asthma. We have been up for 4 nights in a row now. I wish, I could help him. I wish, I could make him all better, but I can't. I can only do what I have been doing. Treating it.
The doctors thought he might just out grow it. It has been getting worse as the weather has been getting hotter. He can't even enjoy playing outside, for a short time. We have never set limits with his asthma. Be a kid and go play. I am thinking, we might have to. I don't want to but, it can't be good for him to be using the machine for medicine all the time. All, the medicine can't be good for him either. I am going to have to call the doctor and see what we can do new. We have done so many things to the house and our lives to help prevent his asthma. I will have to wait and see what we come up with.
On a side note, I still have problems with the girl at C's work. It still bugs me. I guess, I just need to get over it but I can't.
C raced this weekend. The truck is still having the same problems as before. He took 3rd because of over heating problems again. Thought it was fixed but............guess not.
Becca had a tournament last weekend. They took 4th in the gold bracket. Not too bad. Some of the parents aren't too happy with coach. Not too sure what's up with him but, he has changed and Becca can't wait for the season to be over. She is really tired of the "special" ones not getting yelled at for their errors. High school ball is just around the corner. Earned spots and not just handed to them. She knows, she will earn her spot and the fact that she earned it rightfully.
Well, I think he might be down for the night. I sure hope so.